The Sweet Spot

I have a CrossFit competition this weekend. And I desperately want to get it over with. And I desperately don't want to do it. And I have all these crazy mixed up feeling about this whole stupid competitive Crossfit thing and this whole general direction of my life. (Well, that escalated quickly.)

So, I'll just confess it. I'm pretty positive I'm in the middle of a mid-life crisis. Randomly, feelings of panic arise when I start thinking about... well... pretty much about life in general. (Before you start thinking I'm completely crazy. I'm not. Crazy couldn't formulate such clear thoughts. And now I'm wondering... are these clear thoughts? Ok. Breathing. Calming breaths.) This crazy is all mostly brought on my thoughts of this weekend's competition... so, I'll get back to that...

Spring 2014- 1st Rx Competition
This weekend marks ONE YEAR since I entered my first Rx competition. (Rx is the more advanced level of CrossFit-- heavier weights, more complex exercises.) And in some ways, I've come really far. And in other ways, I've still got really far to go. For example, I'm trying not to panic over the weekend's competition. And I'm desperately trying not to think about thrusters and rowing.

I was sitting in chapel today, as I do every Friday (as a teacher in a Christian school). This Friday's chapel happened to be an Easter themed chapel. As I sat watching a dramatic reenactment of the hours leading up to the crucifixion and clips from the movie The Passion of the Christ, I was suddenly flooded with memories of another Friday, another day where I was out-of-my-mind nervous about an upcoming event.

Spring 2011- 1st Spartan Race
My first Spartan Race was four years ago. I didn't know what to expect-- other than it was going to be the most difficult physical challenge that I had ever faced (other than child birth). Like this weekend, it was also Palm Sunday weekend. And to stay calm and focused, I turned to my faith-- the only thing completely true and solid and guaranteed in my life. (Seems like an oxymoron? That's why it's called faith.) I meditated on Scriptures like the following:

It is God who arms me with strength and keeps my way secure. Psalm 18:32

Therefore I run in such a way, as not without aim; I box in such a way, as not beating the air; but I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified. 1 Corinthians 9:26-27

On God my salvation and my glory rest; The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God. Psalm 62:7

I felt peace then. I drew confidence from my faith. Because when the unknown that I face is placed against the Known who has proved Himself faithful to me, everything is ok. My faith is what really matters. My family. I will go and compete. I will enjoy the competition.

The Lord is for me; I will not fear; What can man do to me? Psalm 118:6


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